This issue must depart from the normal feel of a "Think For a Change." I feel a bit self-conscious about what I'm about to write because it won't be anything new or surprising to anyone. It has been said thousands of times by many many different people. However, I agreed to write this issue about Father's Day, and so I will write from the heart ... about Fathers.
Having not yet had the pleasure/torture of being a father, I must write this article from the point of view of someone who has been on the receiving end of fatherhood, and who has observed it but never actually been a father myself.
I feel, as does most everyone else it seems, that a father is one of the most important parts of a child's upbringing. A father doesn't have to be a biological, or even an adoptive parent. The father doesn't even have to live with the child. A father in the sense of the word that I'm using just has to be someone who is willing (willing is the wrong word, I mean wants) to spend time with the child. Someone who can make the child feel that they are special. Someone for the child to look up to. I've lost my train of though, and I'm getting into too broad of a subject area. I want to instead talk about good fathers, and what that means.
I was lucky enough to have a good father. Always courteous and kind, my father taught me not through words, but example, the value of people. He wasn't one to show affection often or overtly, but a squeeze of the shoulders, or a pat on the back made me feel truly happy when it occurred. My father is unlucky enough to have a son who was always doing one thing or another to get himself into trouble. The first memory I have of being disciplined was for blaming my indiscretion on the cat, and since that thime I learned that quickly and honestly disclosing my mistakes greatly diminished the intensity of the punishment that followed. That policy has created responsibility. I just can't seem to blame someone else when I'm the one who screwed up.
I have the pleasure of knowing a few other great Dads. Don Hollingsworth who seems to really enjoy spending time with his kids. Not only does he enjoy it, he makes sure he actually does it. His effort can be seen in the great relationship he has with his kids. Eldon Hunter, always pushing to make sure that his kids have the best opportunities possible, and being very proud of their accomplishments. Again a great relationship his kids. And Darren Munson, who looked happier when he was playing with his kids than at any other time that I've seen him. He seems to love every second that he gets to spend with them though they give him walking pneumonia. All these fathers have one major point in common. They all love their kids deeply, and make sure that their kids know it in one way or another. Of course, I'm no expert on the subject of fatherhood, but when I have kids I will strive to be as committed as the fathers mentioned in this article. There are two very important things a child gains from having such a father: a feeling of belonging and significance, and an example to follow throughout his/her life. I only hope that when I become a father I can be as successful at giving my children these all important gifts.
Happy Father's Day,
UltraBob
